“Forgive me. I have sinned.” I’ve always counted it a
privilege to hear these words, to offer forgiveness. But for years, it
was tainted with self-recrimination: You’re a hypocrite. Indeed, who was
I to forgive or offer counsel, when I struggled with sin that I myself
refused to confess because I couldn’t give it up and wasn’t sure I
wanted to? Now, I have a confession to make.
It began during seminary, scanning photo galleries of
models and actresses that I was attracted to. It seemed harmless, no
threat to my celibate commitment. I took that promise seriously. I had
no illusions that it would be easy, and it wasn’t. This might take the
edge off, I thought.